I sat quietly this morning for the first time in 2 weeks, my little boy Noah has been on school holidays and it’s been a busy and social time. After a couple of breaths, I realized how much I longed for this stillness and connection to self. A deep slowing down to meet me in my feelings, experience, and journey. The quieter I became, the louder the guidance grew – a flood of messy emotions came over me, and then the knowing that to move with life, I needed to allow a very authentic level of acceptance and surrender to settle into my being. Allow it to consume me. It did. I cried. I cried for the part of me that has fiercely navigated the changes of the last year, the me that courageously kept putting one foot in front of the other, the part of me that rose to meet the next level of healing that was required to keep freeing myself from both the self-imposed and otherwise imposed restrictions I had grown to believe to be normal. I cried for the version of me that was too afraid to let go of what I had come to know to be safe, my idea of how my path would unfold, and how I stubbornly tried to fit squares into circles – all while, life, and Spirit were showing me that I was missing the point of this period of growth.

And so I came to surrender – on the floor in front of my scared corner. I allowed the silence to penetrate my entire being, pushing out everything outdated and stale. A candle flickered next to me, holding the guiding light of love as I fully surrendered. ‘Share your soul song fiercely’ the guidance was as loud and clear as it possibly could be. For now, the only road map I have for this guidance is the call to find deep stillness and then share with the world what comes from it. And so, my hearts expression of where I found myself at this moment poured through onto the journal pages in front of me;

To accept is to believe or come to recognize a proposition as valid or correct. To Surrender is to stop resisting. To let go is to empty and create space within our being, which becomes a fierce source of possibility.

There is space to accept that this chapter of my journey is not what I thought it could be and at the same time reflect with pride on how it has unfolded.

There is space to understand that every thought and action that I have, has contributed to this very moment of cracking open.

There is space to accept the feelings of sadness and defeat.

There is space to accept that the only person who hasn’t permitted myself to be altered by my journey is myself, and then to finally offer myself exactly that.

There is space to accept that I will colour the page very differently than what society deems normal and to celebrate this part of myself

There is space to accept that there has been failure without trying to add something to this sentence that justifies it. Just failure.

There is space to accept that I can be unsure of what is next and still be deeply safe in the uncertainty of it all.

There is always space for these realizations to land when we allow our tightened fists to soften. When we allow a step backward to move us from frantic forcing to an aligned space of walking beside life. I’ve come to know after today that when I am here, there is always a hand to hold.

There is no coincidence that we are navigating the cyclic energy of Autumn as I make these shifts in my personal landscape – this is the exact guidance that has been calling to me, faithfully holding space for me to find my way to a space of silence. There is always support, this experience reminds me that the only question here is how long will it take me to hear the call and move beyond my suffocating grip of control.

Place one hand on your heart, one hand on your sacral – inhale the intention to soften, to slip into a few moments of stillness, and to give yourself permission to be in your silence. Exhale with the intention to empty out, to recalibrate, to create space to explore. I’m excited about what you learn about your own heart’s whispers.

Blessings and love x